Beat Chapter 1.

Beat Chapter 2.

Get first place in the Rocker Knockout Contest in Downtown.

Get first place in the Whore-a-thalon.

Get first place in the Butt Brawl.

Get first place in the Psychedelic Slalom through the Mushroom Marsh.

Get first place in the Pigmy Knockout Contest.

Win Smear the Steer in the Havajo Reservation.

Win Hook Up Contest in the Musky Thong.

Get first place in the Hoggin Contest in Missionary Beach.

Get with the hot Robot.

Get with the big Robot.

Get with the Devil's mistress.

Get with one of Hod's chicks.

Get 100 hummers from a hooker.

Get with a hooker 100 times.

Get with 100 hookers from behind.

Beat Chapter 3.

Beat Chapter 4.

Beat Chapter 5.

Beat Chapter 6.

Beat Chapter 7.

Beat Chapter 8.

Beat Chapter 9.

Beat Chapter 10.

Complete the Tutorial.

Defeat the Man.

Defeat Ron Jeremy

Have 10 Man Agents come after you for getting it on.

Have 100 Man Agents come after you for getting it on.

Have 1000 Man Agents come after you for getting it on.

Have 10 Man Agents come after you for doing drugs.

Have 100 Man Agents come after you for doing drugs.

Have 1000 Man Agents come after you for doing drugs.

Get with girls from behind 10 times.

Get with girls from behind 100 times.

Get with girls from behind 1000 times.

Get with 10 Girls normally.

Get with 100 Girls normally.

Get with 1000 Girls normally.

Get 10 hummers.

Get 100 hummers.

Get 1000 hummers.

Play the game for 10 Hours.

Play the game for 100 Hours.

Play the game for 1000 Hours.

Mack 10 chicks.

Mack 100 chicks.

Mack 1000 chicks.

Get with 10 chicks.

Get with 100 chicks.

Get with 1000 chicks.

Get turned down by 10 chicks.

Get turned down by 100 chicks.

Get with 10 hot chicks.

Get with 100 hot chicks.

Get with 1000 hot chicks.

Get with 10 big girls.

Get with 100 big girls.

Get with 1000 big girls.

Get 10 girls off.

Get 100 girls off.

Get 1000 girls off.

Get with 10 chicks and don't get them off.

Get with 100 chicks and don't get them off.

Get with 1000 chicks and don't get them off.

Get 10 girls off multiple times.

Get 100 girls off multiple times.

Get 1000 girls off multiple times.

Knock out 10 random guys minding their own business.

Knockout 100 random guys minding their own business.

Knock out 1000 random guys minding their own business.

Get knocked out 10 times.

Get knocked out 100 times.

Steal the identity of 10 guys.

Steal the identity of 100 guys.

Steal the identity of 1000 guys.

Drink a case worth of beer (24 beers).

Drink a keg's worth of beer (500 beers).

Drink a whole vat worth of beer (1000 beers).

Drink a case worth of whiskey (18 bottles of whiskey).

Drink a whole barrel worth of whiskey (300 bottles of whiskey).

Drink an entire distillery's storage room worth of whiskey (1000 bottles of whiskey).

Smoke an eighth of weed (24 hits).

Smoke a pound of weed (500 hits).

Smoke an entire bushel of weed (1000 hits).

Eat an eighth of shrooms (25 shrooms).

Eat a whole pound of shrooms (250 shrooms).

Eat an entire patch of shrooms (750 shrooms).

Lick two baker's dozens of toads (26 toad licks).

Lick a zoo's worth of toads (250 toad licks)

Lick an army of toads (750 toad licks).

Eat enough peyote to fill a paper bag (25 buttons).

Eat ten pounds of peyote (250 buttons).

Eat a barrel of Peyote (750 buttons).

Smoke an eight ball of crack (25 hits).

Smoke a pound of crack (500 hits).

Smoke a mountain of crack (1000 hits).

Get turned down by 1000 Girls

Get knocked out 1000 times.